Mastering Self-Love: Ditching Negative Self-Talk With Affirmations and Remy Ma's Conceited
Because who’s better at being you than you? Exactly.
If my life depended on rapping one song flawlessly, I’m choosing Remy Ma’s Conceited. Not just because I know every bar like I wrote it myself, but because the song is basically a lyrical affirmation. “You gotta have the mind state like I’m so great; can’t nobody freak it like I could.” Because who’s better at being you than you? Exactly.
Remy Ma cracked the code with this anthem. Conceited was written by Remy Ma and Producer Scott Storch and contains samples of "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred and "Dip It Low" by Christina Milian. With that, the energy is unmatched—loud, unapologetic, and dripping with sultry self-belief. Personally, I rap every word with conviction and, I always feel like that girl. It’s a reminder, a reclaiming of confidence, and, honestly, a little therapy session set to a fire beat.
Affirmations, as a concept, are simple but tricky. The truth is, they work. Speaking positivity into existence rewires our brains, making the things we tell ourselves feel more real. A common entry point? Look in the mirror, smile at yourself, and say, “I love you.” At first, it feels absurd—like you’re auditioning for a cringe role in a straight to Tubi movie. But over time, it sticks. That belief solidifies, and suddenly, you’re not just tolerating yourself; you’re loving yourself.
Sometimes affirmations aren’t as formal as mirror talk. For me, letting out a “I look too good to be buying that” at the grocery store does the job and even helps keep shenanigans out of my shopping cart. Music like Conceited has a unique energy—it resonates, empowers, and uplifts. If you’re building your self-confidence playlist, here are a few affirmational gems to get you started:
Remy Ma – Conceited
Ariana Grande – Just Like Magic
Beyoncé – Bigger
Jazmine Sullivan – Masterpiece (Mona Lisa)
Victoria Monet – On My Mama
Erykah Badu – Didn’t Cha Know
Solange – Borderline (An Ode to Self-Care)
Leikeli47 – Braids tuh’da flo(w)
Janelle Monáe – Float
Megan Thee Stallion – Her
Chloe x Halle – Everywhere
Alex Isley – La Brea
Beyoncé – I’m that girl
Mereba – Black Truck
And while the word “conceited” is often used to criticize vanity or excessive pride, there’s nothing wrong with being unapologetically confident. In fact, sometimes it’s necessary. Think about how many of us are conditioned to think otherwise. Negative self-talk sneaks in, camouflaged as realism or caution, and takes root.
I know this pattern too well. The world can be a very critical of Black women and girls, leaving us to battle a hyper-critical inner voice. Even now, I sometimes catch myself thinking, “Why didn’t you just…” or “You could’ve done better.” I despise how natural it feels to chip away at my own confidence, but it’s destructive.
A homegirl once stopped me mid-rant on a tangent about my shortcomings and said, “Hey, you would never say something like that to me. Be kind. That’s my friend you’re talking about!” Her words completely altered my perception and spoke life into me, because why was I giving myself the kind of critique I’d never dare offer someone else? I deserve the very kindness and compassion, I would offer to a friend. (Thank you for that, Emma.)
Since then, I’ve carried that advice forward, both for myself and others. Negative self-talk is sneaky and mostly a liar, but it’s not at all unbeatable. Sometimes it just takes channeling your inner Remy Ma, reminding yourself, “I’m conceited—I got a reason.”
Because, truly, you do.